Christmas

Well....the festive season is upon us....I have finished my Christmas shopping, the festive booze has been purchased, just a few bits of food to get and then I am done!

So.....I am going to chill out and relax for the next 4 days (at least!) and won't be blogging again until after Christmas so I would just like to say....

A MASSIVE, MASSIVE THANK YOU TO ALL THE FRIENDS AND FAMILY THAT HAVE SUPPORTED US THIS YEAR. IT'S BEEN A HARD YEAR BUT THE SUPPORT FROM YOU MEANS THE WORLD TO US AND THE KIND WORDS HAVE MOST CERTAINLY HELPED ME GET THROUGH THE LAST 12 MONTHS........So from the bottom of my heart, thank you <3

I would like to wish you all a very merry Christmas and send you all my love and best wishes for 2013!

Signing out for now......

I don't have a great deal to write about this week really but just though I would write a little entry anyway, for scrapbooking purposes ;)

We had a well earned night away on Monday (early Christmas present from Mum). Went to see Ellie Goulding at Manchester Academy, it was lovely just to have a break away, even if it was for just one night.

Had quite an emotional month or so and felt unhappy with my current medication and my sleep problems. Also been having lots of muscle pain, some of which started years ago but new symptoms and increasing pain finally led me back to the doctors today.

So yet another change in my AD's, strict instructions to take every day for 28 days and not try and be clever and see if every other day works...fingers crossed, I would love a perfect nights sleep.

Also diagnosed with Chondromalacia Patellae which is damage to the cartilage behind the kneecaps which causes me excruciating pain to the point I struggle to sit/stand or leave my legs in one position for too long.....physio for me so let's hope it helps...I have lots of other aches and pains going on aswell, again some began years ago but the pain has increased dramatically this year so my doctor is monitoring this aswell.

As for everything else.....we are in fundraiser switch off mode at the moment...I need a break before I do any more damage to myself and my health...a few things happening in 2013 to look forward to so hoping these changes help bring back the old me.

Christmas is nearly here, it's come round so quickly this year...I was in a shop in town today and there was a lady at the checkout with her son, the guy on the checkout asked the little boy if he was looking forward to Christmas and the little boy replied in his biggest, loudest most energetic of voices:

'Yes, and it is only 6 sleeps away'

So cute.....lump in my throat moment but I did smile :)

Things that made me smile today :
~ Wrapping my first Christmas presents of the year
~ Receiving a lovely and unexpected birthday gift from my friend, only 8 months late lol

Christmas is a funny time of year for me.....

I'm 32 now so too old to look forward to Santa, presents under the tree etc

When you are kids it is all so special and exciting and when you have children you have it all to make special for them. So, what do you do inbetween? There is a time when you are young and just want to enjoy your life for a few years before settling down and starting a family but everyone kind of has an idea when they want their 'grown up' time to really start!

We take it for granted though don't we? I know I did!

I would love a little family.....I would love to make it all magical for someone else, to see their face on Christmas morning when they know Santa has been ..... if I sit and think about it, it makes me so sad, even hearing the Christmas songs in the supermarket today reminded me of when I was little and how wonderful this time of year was. I always looked forward to the day I would have children and be able to make it so special for them, just like my Mum always did for me.

So, how do you cope with it knowing that you may never be able to do that? 
There is no answer and no definites for us...we genuinely don't know that yes oneday we will definitely succeed with our IVF or that we will get accepted to adopt or even foster...there is no definite for us so I just have to hope.....not easy......but you smile, try and shake off the silly things whirling round in your head and carry on.

Time is flying by and we are getting older, Pete (my amazing husband) turns 44 this coming Wednesday and I am nearly 33.....I just wish we knew what the future holds for us so we could accept it and enjoy life in whatever way we need to.

Things that made me smile today :

~ Remembering that James arthur won this years X-Factor last night.....i'm not ashamed to say I love him and cannot wait to hear his music in 2013 x

~ Knowing that a week today we are going to Manchester to see Ellie Goulding, a break away, even if it is just for one night, it's something to look forward to :) x

I wish I could put into words how I feel today...how I have felt for the last week infact.

I am so touched by all the wonderful messages we have had and all the fantastic gestures people have made in our journey to make a miracle.

Every time someone says something nice, offers words of hope or encouragement it brings me to tears.....I aren't and never have been a person that wants to draw attention to myself so the overwhelming amount of support we have right now truly is amazing and as I said, how I feel right now, I just cannot put into words.

A few moments ago someone sent me this image of some angels that ward 15 at the hospital have made to sell to raise funds for us.....so kind and thoughtful....sometimes feel I don't deserve all this help and support but it is all most definitely teaching me alot of life lessons.

Thank you so much to everyone for their continued support!






On a final note, words from a friend who has an IVF baby...this explains why I want this so much....

'Never give up on your dreams! If I had given up so easily I would not have had what I have now! My precious little Libbie.............the hardest most rewarding thing I have EVER done but worth every injection, every visit to the clinic, every bit of medication, every little scare........basically she is my everything'

Things that made me smile today :

~ Lovely gestures from people we don't know

~ Writing my Christmas cards.....it's beginning to feel alot like christmas!

Just a quick post with an update on what we made on Saturday!!

We made a total of £1360.24 which is fantastic so thank you to everyone involved in making the day happen.

Our grand total is now £2199.93 which is a great start for us.

I haven't stopped crying for 3 days! Emotional, tired, overwhelmed, happy, never felt so many emotions at once.....it is most definitely time for a rest.

Thanks again to all our wonderful family and friends, we can't thank you all enough.

Our Stalls!

Santa & Minnie

I wasn't going to post today but decided to write a few words....

Saturday was our fundraiser event and as a friend said to me 'it will go so quick' and yes, she was right, it certainly did. It was a hectic and busy day from beginning to end and I have never felt as tired as I did yesterday!

The stalls were lovely and the people running them were so nice despite it not getting as busy as we had hoped. The kids loved Santa and Minnie Mouse was a hit, we had a few strolls up and down the high street with her, handing out balloons and biscuits but gosh it was cold....but lots of fun!

I have never seen so many cakes either!! So many people baked for us it was unbelievable!

Without my Mum the day would
 not have been possible....love her so much xx

The Reeds

The evening was great, the band and DJ were fab and there was some great raffle prizes taken home. Nothing went completely to plan but I guess that was to be expected.....we have never planned a big event like this before and I am so proud of what we achieved, we have certainly learnt from it!

It was also lovely to see lots of family and friends, some of which we haven't seen for so long, everyone was just so supportive and needless to say I did end up very emotional!

Laura - aka Minnie!
Love this lady lots, she has done
 so much for us and not complained once :) xx

And today I am still emotional! I am so tired, my feet hurt as I did not sit down once all day or evening, nor did I eat other than 6am breakfast!

Time for a rest I think...








A few pics....

The girls xx

My amazing husband <3 xx

Raffle Prizes!

Lovely to see these 2 :) xx

Joe & Nick - thanks for all your help x

Thank you to everyone for all your support......we will update on the total raised later today :)