Still busy with our house move, our fresh start, we cannot wait and have only a few weeks left before we finally get to move in and look forward to new beginnings.
Something I haven't blogged about yet is, and please don't tell my doctor as I will be in trouble, but I have managed to come off my anti-depressants which is a massive achievement! I didn't mean to, i forgot to take them for a few days as we have been so busy with the new house and I felt 'ok' so thought I would try a few more days and here I am, a few weeks later and all is good.
Maybe the wrong way to come off them...but maybe the right way?!
I think last year took over so much, the tablets were a big part of my life, I thought I needed them, I thought it would take me so long to come off them.....is it all in the mind really?!
Admittedly I needed them in the beginning when I was struggling, but now, in a more positive frame of mind, I think it's the right time to get them out of my life....I feel good for it...
Support from people and also being able to support other people is very important to me right now.
My friend Katy, who was very supportive during our fundraiser planning, is now on her second IVF journey (please correct me if I am wrong Katy x), I love to see her daily updates on what her gorgeous little miracle number one is up to, she is such a cutie, and now she is hoping for miracle number two and I have everything crossed for her - good luck Katy.....definitely think you may be blessed with twins lol xx
Also, Sara, a fellow fundraiser, she has down days like I did but I love to be able to send her words of advice and support, us girls need to stick together and I will do all I can to help Sara on her journey too - good luck Sara, you will get there, keep smiling xx
And, Lianne, although not an IVF'er, you are truly blessed to be on your second journey to motherhood, you really do deserve it and I wish you all the luck in the world xx
I do feel more positive this year, I think having something to keep me busy has helped me massively....as I said to my Mum a few days ago, I don't think a day goes by that I do not think about babies, being a mummy, fundraising, IVF treatment etc etc but we are only here once, we only have one life and I was so lucky to meet my husband that I need to look after the time we have together, enjoy it to the fullest and hope that oneday we are lucky enough to be blessed with a baby Mc'B'!!
Dear Paula
ReplyDeleteYou have no idea how happy it makes me to read this. It has been an extremely difficult year for you and Pete, as all your wonderful, supportive friends know.
It's been so sad for me too, as any mother knows, if your children (even adult ones!) aren't happy then you can't be happy, and it has been heart breaking for me watching you go through 2012 being so down, and not being able to do anything to make you feel better.
BUT I know this year is going to be so much more positive. Already, as you have said, your moving house plans and the work involved have been, I think, very therapeitic for you and amazingly you are both looking and sounding so much more positive...fantastic!
Good luck in your new home, good luck in your job search, and good luck in getting more pennies in the fund raising account, you have a good amount in there after last years events and a good basis to build on to have a go at creating your little miracle.
Also I must agree that you are very lucky to have such a lovely husband, what you two have together is something special. Pete has been amazing coping with you this last year, I know he has commented that he should 'cos he's your husband, but he loves you to bits...cherish him and your time with him, that's special!!
Love you both, always. Mum. XXXX